Monday, March 01, 2004

Ego Masturbation: From Reporting the News to Becoming the News 

Newsday's John Heyman is apparently not content with his current job as Newsday sports columnist. As Yankees, Mets and the Rest pointed out last week (who have named Heyman official enemy of their site), Heyman needed to "take a break from the stink of spring training." Why the hell would one need to take a break from a dream job of getting paid to go to Florida in the dead of winter and report on baseball? Well apparently Heyman needs a break from reporting on sports stories so that he can insert himself into issues so that he becomes the story. The most obvious example of this is his chasing Gary Sheffield around with a dixie cup. Heyman was more than happy to grant several interviews describing his piss hunting exploits. Now Heyman writes that he, the all knowing and wise one, has been grilled by Mets players about the possibility of the Mets trading for Soriano. I was pleased, however, when Heyman got off his high horse and conceded that players usually "think they have better things to do than initiate conversations with reporters." My hopes for the salvation of Heyman's arrogant soul were dashed the very next line when he wrote that players "are wrong about having better things to do. But that's how they think." So let's recap. John Heyman said, in an open and public forum, that Major League Baseball players have nothing better to do than have conversations with him. While I did not see his smug grill when he wrote this, I think Heyman typed this with a straight face. If this isn't the worse case of ego masturbation I have ever seen, I don't know what is.
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